One of the biggest sources of anxiety for fundraisers is determining how much to ask for.
Ask too little, and you leave impact on the table.
Ask too much, and you risk alienating a donor.
In between these extremes is an art—and a discipline—that can transform your fundraising.
Here’s how to think about it.
Start by Knowing Your Donor’s Story
The very first thing to consider is your donor’s actual giving history.
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Have they given to your organization before?
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Have they given consistently?
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How much, and for how long?
If someone hasn’t given before, or has only recently made a small gift, the goal isn’t a major ask—it’s to invite their first real step of partnership.
But if you have a donor who has given the same amount—or increased their giving—for at least two consecutive years, you have something much more powerful: a donor you can build a deeper relationship with.
Consistency is the foundation.
It shows trust, alignment, and genuine partnership.
How Past Giving Guides Future Asking
When a donor has a pattern of support, you have a baseline to guide your ask.
This is where the 5–25 Rule comes in.
A simple way to frame your next ask is to consider requesting somewhere between 5x to 25x their largest consistent annual gift.
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A donor who consistently gives $1,000? You might ask for $5,000 to $25,000, depending on your relationship, timing, and opportunity.
But—and this is crucial—the bigger the ask, the stronger the reason must be.
You cannot ask someone to 25x their gift just because you want a bigger number.
You need a compelling story. A big vision. An urgent opportunity. Something that resonates at a much deeper level than your operational needs.
Donors don’t give big to meet your budget.
They give big to change something.
Big Asks Require Big Reasons
There’s a principle you cannot forget:
The bigger the ask, the better your reason needs to be.
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A 5x ask might be justified by a deepening relationship or a logical next step.
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A 25x ask requires something transformational—something that invites the donor to see themselves in a much larger narrative.
If you’re preparing a significant ask, you need to be ready to connect it to a bold new project, a once-in-a-generation opportunity, or a moment of rare urgency.
Simply “needing more money” is not a reason.
A bold vision is.
Look Beyond What They’ve Given You
Another mistake fundraisers make is basing ask amounts only on what a donor has given to their organization.
You must ask:
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Has this donor made larger gifts elsewhere?
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Are they involved deeply with other causes?
If a donor has given $100,000 to another organization but only $1,000 to yours, you need to expand your vision.
Do not let their giving to you define their total capacity.
It’s your job to invite them into a bigger story—not to stay confined to what they’ve given you before.
Timing, Trust, and Making the Ask
When it’s time to make the ask, treat it as a significant moment in the relationship.
Not a transaction.
Not a number in an email.
A real invitation to deeper partnership.
You should:
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Set the stage with gratitude and impact.
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Share the bold vision clearly and confidently.
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Invite them to step into a bigger role, not just give a bigger gift.
Instead of “Would you increase your support?”
Think:
“We would love for you to be one of the cornerstone investors launching this next chapter.”
Invite them to become part of something larger than themselves.
Stewarding the Relationship Beyond the Ask
Making a bold ask is only part of the journey.
Regardless of the outcome, every donor needs stewardship, care, and consistent relationship-building afterward.
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Celebrate every milestone and new level of giving.
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Reinforce the impact of their involvement.
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Invite them to grow with you over time.
Think beyond today’s gift.
Think about the trajectory of your relationship.
When done well, a donor who gives $10,000 this year could become a $100,000 donor over time—because they were invited into a compelling story and consistently shown their impact.
Conclusion: Asking Boldly, Building Wisely
There’s no perfect formula for how much to ask for—but there are principles that make a world of difference.
Ground your asks in real giving history.
Match the size of the ask to the strength of the reason.
Expand your vision to match the donor’s capacity.
And always think about the relationship you’re building, not just the gift you’re requesting.
Fundraising is not about money.
It’s about vision, trust, and partnership.
If you want a practical tool to guide you step-by-step, check out our
How Much to Ask Roadmap
It’s time to ask boldly—and wisely.
Ready to take your fundraising to the next level?
If you want to stop guessing, start asking boldly, and consistently move donors to deeper levels of partnership, Peak Performance is for you.
Peak Performance is our 9-week coaching program designed to help you master the mindset, strategies, and systems behind successful major gifts fundraising.
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