Let’s be honest: fundraising can wear on you.
You’re always giving. Always asking. Always carrying the weight of your mission and your goals. It’s easy—so easy—to slide into cynicism, frustration, or fatigue. You start seeing donors as obstacles instead of partners. You start feeling like a beggar instead of a bridge-builder.
And here’s the truth: bitterness and entitlement are natural side effects of a distorted view of fundraising.
That’s why the most important practice I’ve adopted over the years is this:
I’m not just thankful—I train for gratitude.
It’s a muscle. And if you want to raise money with joy, lead your donors well, and stay in this work for the long haul, you’ve got to exercise it.
Gratitude Is the Foundation
If you genuinely feel gratitude—deep, real, daily gratitude—your donors will feel it too. Not performative thank-you’s. Not box-checking acknowledgments. But an actual spirit of gratitude.
As Henri Nouwen writes in A Spirituality of Fundraising:
“We will be cut off from our donors, because we will find ourselves begging for money and they will find themselves merely handing us a check.”
No one wants to be on either end of that exchange.
But here’s the good news: gratitude breaks that cycle.
And today, I want to give you four simple, actionable exercises that will help you grow your gratitude muscles—so that your joy, generosity, and impact can grow right alongside them.
1. Start Your Day with Thanks (And Write It Down)
I start most mornings journaling a short gratitude list. Sometimes it’s big stuff: my marriage, my kids, the people I get to work with. Sometimes it’s small: espresso, State College, Pennsylvania, or even a really bad diner cup of coffee.
The point isn’t perfection. It’s perspective.
When you take time to see the good in your life—on purpose—you develop the ability to see the good in others. Especially your donors.
Action Step: Take 3–5 minutes each morning to jot down a few things you’re thankful for. Big or small. Just write them.
2. Send a Thank-You Text (Every Day)
We get good at the things we do consistently.
So I’ve made it a daily habit to send at least one text message thanking someone: a teammate, a pastor, my kids, a worship leader at church, a former coach. Just a simple note to say, “I saw what you did. It mattered.”
It takes 30 seconds. It builds connection. It strengthens your awareness of others. And it forms you into a person who doesn’t just feel gratitude—but shows it.
Action Step: Before the day ends, send one thank-you text. Make it part of your routine.
3. Write a Legacy Letter
You’ve probably heard me talk about this one if you’ve gone through Peak Performance.
Think of someone in your life—maybe from years ago—who shaped you. Someone who brings up feelings of deep gratitude. A teacher. A mentor. A friend. A parent.
Now write them a long, heartfelt letter. Say what we usually wait until the funeral to say.
Action Step: Take 15 minutes this week to write that letter. Mail it. Let them hear it while they’re still alive.
4. Tip Bigger (Yes, Really)
This one might surprise you. But hear me out.
When we give, our hearts follow. Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
So here’s a challenge: Add 5% to your usual tip. For the next three months. Every time. Whether the service was excellent or average. Whether the BBQ sauce was free… or an extra charge.
Tip big. Be generous. And watch what happens—not just to your wallet, but to your heart.
Action Step: Increase your tip percentage by 5%. See if you don’t find yourself noticing—and appreciating—people in service roles more deeply.
Gratitude Is Contagious
One of the best compliments I’ve ever received was from someone who said:
“Your training didn’t just make me a better fundraiser. It made me more grateful. Not just for my donors, but for my waitress.”
If there’s one thing I want for you, it’s that.
I want you to be a life-giving force in the world. I want your donors to feel your gratitude. I want you to feel joy again when you sit down to write that next appeal.
And I want you to raise more money because you’re living in abundance—not fear or pressure.
Want to keep building your fundraising muscles?
If this resonated with you, check out the Major Gifts Fundraiser Podcast on Spotify. Each episode is packed with stories, strategies, and encouragement to help you stay joyful, inspired, and effective in your fundraising journey.
P.S. If you haven’t tried the ClarkBot yet—it’s like having me in your pocket, 24/7. You can ask fundraising questions, get feedback on your donor communications, and practice hard conversations.
And if you want to dive even deeper, Monica is leading a new asynchronous course: Write Your Year-End Appeal in 5 Days. It’s designed to help you write and launch your full year-end campaign with clarity and confidence.